Dear mummy,
It has been 10 years since the day you went away. I just can't believe how time flies. The truth is, it still feels as if it was yesterday. I can't even put in words the pain that I feel everyday...
Mummy, I think of you everyday. I still cry every morning on my way to work. I still have hard times at night before going to bed. I just can't erase the memory in my head. I want to remember you, all the wonderful things about you, all the great times that we've had...all those silly moments about you... like the day you poured a can of pepsi into the pot of porridge....the time you took a sanitary pad out of your handbag and placed it on the restaurant table thinking that it was a pack of tissue papers.. haha...... Instead, the picture of you laying there lifeless, the image of them carrying your casket away.. the image of them pushing your casket into that burning fire... Sometimes I drink myself silly so that I would stop thinking or even functioning.
I tell myself constantly... I am going to take good care of bros and myself. I don't want to disappoint you.... Do you remember...just days before you left, you told me while you were laying on the sofa, that you were not going to make it anymore and you wanted me to take very good care of the two bros.. I never forget that....
I just wish you're here with me.. I wish I was a better daughter.. I wish I was there more often when you needed me.. I wish I was the one who's sick and I wish God would just take my life instead of yours.
I miss you mummy....
